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I See Spots

By now, you’ve probably realized that I am not much of a persuasive person. I mean, I have strong opinions about things but never succeed in getting my way because I don’t have a strong personality.

So far, in life, this has created a lot of stress for me.

Recently, this has resulted in me undergoing the sonohysterogram that I so very much was opposed to, since we, as a lesbian couple (and not an infertile couple) had no indication that it was necessary. But after haggling with a nurse who insisted that it was part of the fertility clinic’s mandatory monitoring process, I gave in. Angrily, I gave in.

So today, early in the morning, I had my feet in cold stirrups, bum at the edge of a paper-and-doggy-pee-pad-lined examination table, and endured the awkward small talk with 2 technicians because I am weak.

The whole procedure lasted a mere few minutes, but definitely involved some strong cramping during and after. In the car, I called my wife, nearly in tears because of the cramping. I admitted to her that while I’ve certainly had menstrual cramps worse than this, it was the psychological aspect of being violated and the spots of blood on the examination table that could only have come from an angry cervix.

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3 thoughts on “I See Spots

  1. ugh yes, the doggy pee pad. that’s exactly it! the spotting didn’t end there for me…i stopped in at McDonald’s for a coffee and used the washroom. i had to stay for 5 minutes at least because the bleeding would not stop. never again. i really hope i never have to have that test done again. thank god it’s over.

    • That is awful. There’s nothing more frightening than seeing a trail of your own blood. I remember my cervix felt swollen and bruised for days after. When I asked my RE afterwards about it- he said that there’s usually no pain and no bleeding. That the doc who did it must’ve had to fight his way through my cervix and that’s why all the blood and pain. Having fibroids there though….. I can see why you bled so much. Shitty. Big hug for you girl!

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