IVF#2: Embryo Development Day 4

Last year, this is where the major short listing happened, as we went from 11 embryos on day three to 8 embryos on day four.

Yesterday, I informed you that all fertilized embryos were still alive and kickin’. However, their grades weren’t all the same:
6 graded good
5 graded average
2 graded poor

I figured that we would probably have one or two less than last IVF make it to the day four compacted morula stage.

But I was wrong.

And I’m about to cry.

Of the 11 day three (good and average graded) embryos from yesterday….

FOUR were compacting.

How the hell did we go from 11 to 4?
Last year we went from 11 to 8!

I have made so many changes to try to produce better quality eggs (no evidence that my egg quality was a problem even) this time around, like:
– supplements
– minimal exercise
– more sleep
– Chinese herbs
– no coffee
– less sugar
– more fat

So WTF?????!

The embryologist said, “Hopefully, we will have 1 or 2 to transfer tomorrow.”

Last year we had SEVEN blastocysts.

She said that the remaining embryos are still alive, and could just be slow growers. Some could become day 6 blastocysts. There are a couple that have a lot of fragmentation, so they are unlikely to progress further even though they are still alive. She didn’t really seem to want to carry on talking to me, or giving me details like she had in previous phone calls.

I guess no one likes to be the bearer of bad news.

Please please please universe, help all four of my morulas keep growing and thriving so that they can come home where they belong. Send love to the embryos who have fallen behind so that they too, have a fighting chance.

Friends, please send me hope, peace, and positivity, as I can feel my anxiety spiralling out of control already. I don’t want to relive the hell that was IVF#1. This is my chance to restore hope in the things out of my control. Thank you.

PS- my OHSS has gotten a bit worse again. There’s no pain now, but my weight is up 2lbs, my circumference up 2cm, and I drank more than I peed out yesterday.

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IVF#2: Embryo Development Day 3

So last year, we had 14 fertilized embryos on day 1, 11 of which survived to day 3.

Today, I got an update that all of our embryos are at the appropriate 6-8 cell stage, with one embryo having 10 cells already. Normal for day three is anywhere from 4-10 cells, ideally 8 cells by the end of the day, so we’re good there.

Now, of the entire batch of embryos:
6 are grade 2 (good quality, minimal fragmentation)
5 are grade 3 (average quality, moderate fragmentation)
2 are grade 3-4 (poor quality, a lot of fragmentation)

Judging by the total count of embryos here (13), I’m guessing that the single slow grower from yesterday caught up to the group.

The grading made me a bit nervous though, as I wonder why I don’t have any perfect grade 1 embryos. Is the grade 1 embryo just super rare? Is my egg quality not great, or is the grade 1 embryo a mythical creature like the unicorn?

Everything that I have read says that both the grade 2 and 3 embryos have good implantation potential. And a greater indicator of making it to the blastocyst stage is the embryo making the expected number of cells for its developmental day.

OHSS Watch:

Weight: down 1 pound
Umbilicus circumference: down 1 cm

I got out of bed today, and had minimal problems dressing myself (yesterday, DW had to help me put on my pants and socks- which was actually quite enjoyable). Peeing and pooping still hurt, but changing positions is accompanied by only mild pain now. My ovaries are still sore on palpation, but more like a sore muscle than active inflammation. The bloating is still there, much worse at night, but sleeping and peeing lots overnight seems to bring me back to a less bloated baseline.

DW and I started watching this show called “Transparent”, which has been really fantastic. It’s about a Jewish Patriarch who comes out as transgender to her family of quirky adult children. It’s got this really interesting tone to it. A humorous backdrop, with really deeply somber and tender moments. I’m loving it, and have to try hard to savour each episode rather than binge watch it.

Tonight though, is the Bachelor, and while I object to the whole premise of the show, I can’t seem to look away. Why is there always so much crying?

PS- embryo transfer is happening in T-minus 48 hours!!

IVF#2: Embryo Development Day 2

(Image from: http://www.advancedfertility.com/4cell.htm )
On day 2 of development, embryos should have 4 cells. The grading of them depends on the level of fragmentation.

Of our 13 fertilized embryos:
7 have 4-5 cells, and are graded as good
5 have 4-5 cells, and are graded as average
1 has 2 cells, but is still alive and could catch up

I asked the embryologist to give us daily updates, which they don’t normally do. I am so grateful that she is doing this for us, and appreciate the time she takes to answer our questions.

OHSS watch:
Weight: up 0.2 of a pound
Waist measurement: up 1 cm

How I’m feeling: Ovaries are still sore, especially with movement, peeing and pooping. The Dostinex is still making me super nauseous despite taking it at night and with food. DW made me a great breakfast in bed: GF grilled cheese and soft boiled eggs, with a side of Gravol.

Today, I start all of my embryo transfer meds:
– prednisone 10mg
– endometrin (progesterone suppositories)- 100mg x 3 times a day
– prometrium (progesterone orally)- 300m at bedtime
– Fragmin injections

*TMI Warning*
Shoving the Endometrin in my vagina was a real treat this morning (not!). My vagina is clearly still in the early stages of healing after all the egg retrieval punctures. I couldn’t get the suppository more than two inches inside, because everything was clenched and hurt.

I’m a little worried about the Prednisone, because last time (failed FET) it caused major comfort food cravings, as well as water retention. This time, I’m trying to stave off OHSS, and the last thing I need is to crave bad food and retain water. However, a nice therapeutic effect of the prednisone is that it made my digestive issues go away. Honestly, my usual IBS and Celiac issues seem to go away when I’m on the Prednisone, which is wonderful.

IVF#2: Day 1 Fertilization Report

So remember my post about fertilizing our eggs via conventional IVF vs. ICSI? Well last year, we had 19 mature eggs, and opted for 1/3 IVF and 2/3 ICSI. Last year we had 14 fertilize.

Today I got a call that out of our 21 eggs collected, 13 were mature, and all 13 fertilized via ICSI.

Now I’m a little upset that only 13 of the 21 were mature. I was hoping for more. However, I am so glad that I posted my dilemma about IVF vs. ICSI, and that with your support and sharing of experiences, DW and I decided to go all ICSI.

I am also glad that I spoke to the embryologist yesterday, and asked her how they select when eggs get IVF’d and which ones get ICSI’d. Apparently, they can only do ICSI on mature eggs, but immature eggs can be fertilized via IVF. So if you choose to do a “split” of ICSI and IVF, they choose the mature ones first for the numbers you’ve designated for ICSI, and the remaining (including immature eggs) are used for IVF. So if you choose to do a split, you may have a greater yield of fertilization because they can utilize those immature eggs, which are still capable of fertilizing. However, if you choose to do all ICSI, you can’t use those immature eggs at all.

OHSS update:

Weight: same as yesterday
Circumference at umbilicus: same as yesterday

I have been in progressively more pain as time passes since the retrieval. I have been popping extra strength Tylenol every four hours, which works, but wears off after about three hours. I woke up in the middle of the night with searing abdominal pain (meds wore off), and had to pee, which hurt like hell. I have been asked by the clinic to track my liquid intake and output, which has been very difficult for me. We have a measuring cup in the bathroom for that, and I always forget at the time I start to pee. Plus, the perfectionist part of me hates not having a very accurate system for measuring liquid from things like vegetables. I also dislike how I’m measuring my intake in millilitres, and my output in cups. I know it’s a simple conversion, but it still bugs me.

Things that hurt: walking (a bit), rolling over in bed, changing position, twisting, putting on pants, putting on socks.

Things that really hurt: coughing, sneezing, peeing, pooping.

So far, it just feels like my ovaries are inflamed from having holes poked in them. However, thankfully, my belly isn’t more distended than on retrieval day. From what I remember though, the OHSS didn’t really show until a couple of days after the retrieval.

Anyways, more salty snacks and soup for me!

IVF#2: Egg Retrieval Part II

So I laid 21 eggs today! At least, that’s how many the RE collected from me this morning.

The procedure went much better this time around. I pretty much told every nurse and the RE about how quickly I metabolize anaesthetic, and they gave me an extra dose at the beginning of the procedure. I felt my head get heavy, the room started to look blurry, and while I was aware of what was going on at a very superficial level. I didn’t feel any pain, which was really nice.

After the procedure, I recovered in the lounge with apple juice and the snacks that we packed: coconut water and homemade cornbread muffins. Since I had been fasting since 7pm the night before, I was ravenous. I basically stuffed my face as the nurse was trying to explain the discharge items to me. I felt a bit dazed, but then we had a chance to see one of the embryologists, as I wanted to discuss our choice of fertilization method.

We have decided to do 100% ICSI.

They will start the ICSI tonight and then we will get a fertilization report tomorrow.

After that, DW went to grab the car and came to pick me up from the front door of the clinic. I was feeling woozy getting into the car, and started to salivate. In that moment, I knew I was gonna puke, so I opened the door, leaned out, and puked all over the sidewalk in front of the clinic. DW hung onto me by the back of my jacket, and I was so glad my dreads were tied up, because I had four good barfs before I was empty. Goodbye apple juice, coconut water, cornbread muffins, and water!

On our way home, we make two stops. One at Whole Foods because all I could stomach was soup. Another at Walmart to grab some Tylenol for the post-retrieval pain as well as some Gravol because the Dostinex makes me so nauseous.

I’ve spent the rest of the afternoon lounging on the couch, binge watching Broadchurch on Netflix. DW has been taking very good care of me- unlimited fetches, making food, bringing me meds. She also took the dogs out while I vegged on the couch.

The anaesthetic wore off by the time we got home, as I have some pain with moving, but much worse with peeing. I haven’t pooped all day, and I dread having to do it. I finally pooped and while it was moderately painful, I survived. There may have been some whimpers coming from the bathroom.

I have been taking Extra Strength Tylenol every 4 hours, which has taken the edge off and made the pain quite mild. But from what I remember, the OHSS came on with a vengeance a few days after the retrieval, so the worst is yet to come.

Since we had so many eggs retrieved, they’ve already got us booked for a five-day transfer. We transfer on Wednesday! I am hoping and praying that we get a lot of good quality blastocysts over the next couple of days. I’ll post their progress along the way.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and well wishes. I appreciate all of your support. I don’t know how I would have gotten through the past two years without you all.

For now, here’s a picture of two of my cutest girls:

IMG_6186

Juno (the big dog) saved Clementine (the little dog) and I from a coyote that was stalking us two days ago. We were walking on a path on the side of a hill, when a coyote cut us off about 30 feet ahead. Juno chased it down the hill and across a valley, probably about 0.75 of a kilometre long. Luckily, she is bigger than the coyotes, so they are afraid of her and run away. It’s one of the major dangers of taking the dogs to this conservation area. There are deer, coyotes, beavers, and other native wildlife. We always try to go during the day time because the coyotes are more active in the evening. I feel so grateful for Juno’s protection, even though she is generally a super suck 99.9% of the time.

Anyhow, fertilization report tomorrow!

IVF#2: Egg Retrieval Part I

Last night before bed, I re-read my egg retrieval post from our first IVF. I remember most of it, especially the pain. It’s crazy to me that some women report it to be painless, as my experience was that it was the worst pain that I’ve ever experienced in my life. Now, let me explain. I metabolize anaesthetics very quickly. When I go for dental work, they always need to give me two to three times the dose of anaesthetic. During last egg retrieval, they didn’t believe me, and after seeing me writhe in pain during the procedure, the RE told them to give me “more of the cocktail”. I clenched my jaw, squeezed DW’s hand, but still, I felt every single stab into each ovary. After the second dose of anaesthetic, things just went hazy and I woke up after it was all over.

Currently, I am sitting in a medical gown, ass exposed, waiting for an IV. DW has lovingly packed me snacks and coconut water, as well as a puke bag just in case. I’ve been fasting since last night, and was up at 7am, so I’m starving right now.

Anyways, here goes round two! Wish us luck!

Day Three Embryo Report

I think I have OHSS. In fact, I’m certain I have it. In the past twenty-four hours, I’ve gained nearly three pounds, and my abdomen has increased in circumference by at least 3 centimetres. My belly is taut and hard to the touch, and it hurts changing positions, going pee (and poo), and coughing. I imagine this is how it feels to be extremely pregnant.

In other news, I received an update from the embryologist!

Of our 14 fertilized embryos:
8 of the 10 ICSI-fertilized embryos are at the 6-8 cell stage
3 of the 4 IVF-fertilized embryos are beyond the 8 cell stage and are growing fast!

In total, we have 11 embryos still in the race, on their way to becoming morulas in the next 24 hours!

embryos