21.5 Weeks: I Spoke too Soon

Not 24 hours after proclaiming how much wonderful energy I had, did it all come tumbling down. I am so tired again every afternoon, and have been napping to get through each day. I have also noticed an increase in my appetite, and have added another meal to my day, which tells me that maybe Dumplin’ is going through a growth spurt. 

Also, I’ve totally finished my stash of Diclectin (Diclegis) and have been dry heaving once or twice a day again. Ugh. I’m almost 22 weeks! Why am I still so nauseous?! With that, has returned some food aversions, particularly of the chicken variety, which sucks because chicken had become a healthy staple in my diet, bringing my protein count up. Now, I wanna gag anytime I think about it. Yuck!

Today, I met with our union’s parental leave person, who went through the whole paperwork process with me and explained how everything works. I’m feeling pretty excited about all of it, but there is a lot of paperwork, which makes me a bit nervous. At my next midwife appointment (tomorrow), I will have to get a signed letter confirming Dumplin’s due date, which will be sent to my principal as well as the school board, as the first step in initiating this process. The rest of it kind of happens once I have started my leave, and then when Dumplin’ actually arrives. My plan is to teach in September and October, as long as I am physically comfortable doing so. Once things start becoming really uncomfortable, I might be able to take some time off before his due date, if medically necessary. 

Questions for y’all: 

1. By how many weeks were you becoming physically uncomfortable at work?

2. How close to your due date did you (or do you plan to) work until?

3. How much time do you feel would’ve been ideal to have off before baby’s due date?

Thanks in advance for your answers!

Now I will leave you with photos of some cute things that I’ve sewn recently for Dumplin’: Waterproof PUL wet diaper bags (one is for him and one is for my swim stuff).   3-Layer flannel fox print bandana drool bibs, white organic bamboo microfleece soakers (size large and small), and flannel PJ’s.

 Linen newborn kimono.

Lastly, I think our registry is pretty well done. We hammered out details, read reviews, and debated between our wants vs. needs, and also left out things we can probably get second hand. Woohoo!

Have a great Monday!

7 Weeks

Hi folks, I’m sorry that I haven’t been posting as much lately, but I have been feeling like garbage. This week has been a real shitshow in terms of nutrition, thanks to the pregnancy sickness that started a couple of days before six weeks. It started off as random food aversions, and then more aversions and bouts of dry heaving started, and now I am basically grossed out by all food. It’s worse when I prepare food, so in order to survive, I’ve been dining and grabbing take out a lot more than usual. 

I’m not as exhausted in the afternoons now, which is nice, and I haven’t been napping all week. I do have a mild headache in the afternoon and evenings, which when combined with the nausea, makes me feel super hungover (without the fun night before). 

I am eating though, even if it is a battle, and I’m trying to include as many healthy items (protein and veggies) as I can to offset the bad things that I seem to enjoy right now, like popsicles, lollipops, and juice (sugary things that I normally never eat). 

I turned 33 this week, and celebrations were very chill, as I wasn’t feeling very well with the UTI symptoms (that didn’t end up being a UTI). My in-laws drove down to take DW and I for lunch for our birthdays. We went to a very nice Italian restaurant that does gluten-free substitutions for their pastas and pizzas. I had my favourite pizza there, with prosciutto di parma, figs, arugula, mascarpone and grano padano cheese, and a drizzle of honey. 



(Photo from Trip Advisor- my pizza looked almost exactly the same as this)

The pizza was delicious, but I struggled  with nausea during the car ride to the restaurant, as well as towards the end of our lunch, because I devoured the entire pizza (in comparison, DW only ate half of her pizza). When we got back to our house, my MIL surprised me with homemade gluten-free brownies, which were delicious. I felt bad because I didn’t feel much like eating again after our car ride, but I froze them so that I can enjoy them once my appetite returns. I thought it was super sweet of her though. 

The weather has warmed up a bit here, which has been nice for my mood, but terrible for keeping the dogs clean. DW has started some plants from seed, and they are now doing very well under the grow-lights. We’ve got leeks, green onions, eggplant, peppers, and lettuce going right now. Other plants will be started in a couple of weeks. Mid-May, we start considering putting them in the ground. 

Other than that, not much is new. I am so grateful that the bleeding stopped and has not returned. I sometimes feel a fluttering near my left ovary area. I suspect that the little Dumplin’ may have implanted on the left. It has almost been two weeks since my last ultrasound (5w3d) where the tech saw the gestational sac and yolk sac, and I’m anxious as hell to see a heartbeat on Monday (7w3d). This has been the longest two-week-wait yet. I feel like I have been perceiving this time as an extension of my original two-week-wait, because of our previous loss which happened at around 7-8 weeks (but the embryo stopped developing a week earlier than that). I haven’t allowed myself to celebrate this pregnancy yet because my body has shown that it can be fooled into continuing to carry a pregnancy that has already stopped. That’s why this next ultrasound is so important to us. 

However, I do appreciate the support from all of you, and your happiness for me is helping me to believe that this will work out. In particular, I received this lovely card in the mail from Alicia at Ladyloveandbabydust! 



It actually arrived on my birthday, but I was thrilled that it was to celebrate my BFP! I feel like this baby would be the best birthday present ever. 

In other news, after finding out that the midwifery practice in our region was fully booked, I went out on a limb and contacted 4 neighbouring midwifery clinics. All of the clinics explicitly say on their websites that they will not service residents outside of their catchment areas, but I sent in applications anyway. One by one, I heard back from each clinic, them reiterating that they could not accept me because I lived outside of their catchment area. Keep in mind, that for two of these clinics, I am outside by only one major street. Then, two days ago, I heard back from the last midwifery clinic, which is located the furthest distance away (technically two cities away), accepting me for an appointment next week! There are two hospitals near us, and they have privileges at the one a little further away. This hospital is the same one that my endocrinologist and RE are affiliated with, and the same one that I had my D&C at. Anyways, I’m so excited to meet our midwives on Tuesday! Last week I asked my family doctor whether she thought I should go with a midwife or an OB, and she said that a midwife would align more with my personality and needs. She said of course, that’s if everything goes well and this is deemed a low-risk pregnancy at the time I’m discharged from the fertility clinic.

I can’t wait until Monday, when hopefully we get to see the little Dumplin’s heartbeat. I hope she is thriving as expected, and that me and her Maman can finally stop holding our breaths. 

In the meantime, little Dumplin’s furry sisters are on guard. 



6 Weeks

So in education, we are big fans of “icebreaker” activities. A common one that is used is the “two truths and a lie” game where each individual presents the group with three facts about themselves- two which are true, and one which is untrue. The group guesses as to which fact is untrue, and then the answer is revealed and on to the next person. I always hate this game because I have a bit of social anxiety over people staring at me and focusing on aspects of me. But since it’s Friday, you all aren’t physically staring at me, I thought I’d play it with you.

Two Truths and a Lie:

– I may have a kidney infection

– I am still bleeding/spotting

– I have morning sickness

Now, take a guess, make a mental note of it, and post about it in the comments 🙂

The answers will be revealed as you read below.

Now for some food porn:



My favourite cheap quick eat in Leslieville, Toronto- at Hanoi 3 Seasons. 

Well it’s been a while since I’ve touched base on here. Not a lot has been happening really. The big dog has been all sorts of bad and stealing food off the counters. I am partially to blame, leaving things like sticks of butter, freshly baked GF banana chocolate chip muffins, and focaccia sticks not far enough back on the counter. The little dog says its entrapment. 

The other day, a good teacher friend of mine brought her 8 month old identical twin boys over, and we had a great afternoon. This teacher friend (who is an amazing teacher) was being bullied really badly by the other teachers at the school we worked at last year. Out of a group of 17 teachers, I was the only one that called these people out on their bullying. It was so bad that she applied out to work at a different school when she returns from maternity leave. It’s sad because I loved working with her. 

Anyways, her boys are the cutest with our dogs. Juno and Clem are super gentle with them, allow them to pull tufts of their fur out, lick drool and snot off their faces, and allow the babies to use them to brace themselves when they try to stand up. It melts my heart, and with Juno being almost 9 years old, I hope she will still be as patient and loving with our kids, whenever they come. Feeding time was a frenzy though, as the babies were entertained by dangling their food over the edge of their food trays. Both dogs were in heaven when the babies were tossing their little food bits all over the floor. I think this contributed to Juno’s food stealing craze. It’s like giving booze to an alcoholic in AA during a moment of weakness- it sets off an uncontrollable sequence of events.

Wednesday, at 5w5d, nausea kicked in. It isn’t so bad once I get food in my tummy, but the thought of eating chicken makes me want to puke. I’m pretty much surviving on Vans GF Waffles, scrambled eggs, and juice.

For a couple of days, I was obsessed with everything tomato-based: tomato soup, tomato sauce, salsa, chilli. But I think I overdid it, and the thought of any of it makes me a bit queasy.

Overall, I’m just tired and not interested in eating. I’m especially uninterested in preparing food. 

Symptom wise, my boobs are so sore that I can’t sleep comfortably on my stomach anymore. My back is sore. I am exhausted, take naps almost daily, yet have some insomnia that causes me to wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to fall back asleep. I have mild headaches in the afternoon that kind of feel like a hangover.

Cause for celebration: I HAVE NOT BLED OR SPOTTED IN 3 FULL DAYS!

Last night I couldn’t sleep because I had an aching pain through my flank and abdomen on the right side. It didn’t feel muscular at all, so today I went in to see my family doctor and she sent my urine away for urinalysis. We find out on Monday if I have a UTI or a kidney infection. I don’t have a fever but if I develop one before I hear back from her, I have some Keflex antibiotic just in case. I do feel quite rotten, and almost like I had a flu yesterday. 

Otherwise, not much else to report. Still a week and 3 days until my ultrasound…. It’s feels like forever.

IVF#2: Embryo Development Day 2

(Image from: http://www.advancedfertility.com/4cell.htm )
On day 2 of development, embryos should have 4 cells. The grading of them depends on the level of fragmentation.

Of our 13 fertilized embryos:
7 have 4-5 cells, and are graded as good
5 have 4-5 cells, and are graded as average
1 has 2 cells, but is still alive and could catch up

I asked the embryologist to give us daily updates, which they don’t normally do. I am so grateful that she is doing this for us, and appreciate the time she takes to answer our questions.

OHSS watch:
Weight: up 0.2 of a pound
Waist measurement: up 1 cm

How I’m feeling: Ovaries are still sore, especially with movement, peeing and pooping. The Dostinex is still making me super nauseous despite taking it at night and with food. DW made me a great breakfast in bed: GF grilled cheese and soft boiled eggs, with a side of Gravol.

Today, I start all of my embryo transfer meds:
– prednisone 10mg
– endometrin (progesterone suppositories)- 100mg x 3 times a day
– prometrium (progesterone orally)- 300m at bedtime
– Fragmin injections

*TMI Warning*
Shoving the Endometrin in my vagina was a real treat this morning (not!). My vagina is clearly still in the early stages of healing after all the egg retrieval punctures. I couldn’t get the suppository more than two inches inside, because everything was clenched and hurt.

I’m a little worried about the Prednisone, because last time (failed FET) it caused major comfort food cravings, as well as water retention. This time, I’m trying to stave off OHSS, and the last thing I need is to crave bad food and retain water. However, a nice therapeutic effect of the prednisone is that it made my digestive issues go away. Honestly, my usual IBS and Celiac issues seem to go away when I’m on the Prednisone, which is wonderful.

Ugh… Symptoms

Despite being off the progesterone for two days now, it seems that my HCG continues to rise, and that this morning sickness just won’t quit.

Let me paint you a picture:

Wake up. Take my Synthroid with a full glass of water. Smell the faint trace of chlorination in the water, gag a little.

Dry heave. (I must be hungry).

Go to the kitchen, with intentions to make a healthy breakfast. Open the fridge to find inspiration. Become overwhelmed by the variety of potential aromas.

Dry heave, grab the gluten-free cupcake box, and slam the fridge door closed.

Decide to make a Non-Oprah chai tea latte to go with my salted caramel apple cupcake (since I have been depriving myself of caffeine since the beginning of this FET). Open the carton of lactose-free milk, imagine the musk of the udder that it was milked from, nearly hurl. Continue to steep tea and steam milk anyway.

IMG_5045.JPG

Bring my latte and cupcake outside to encourage the forced eating process a little bit. Split the cupcake in half to sandwich the icing. Lick my fingers that are covered in icing, taste too much coconut oil in the icing, almost hurl.

Scrape off icing and eat cupcake like it’s a muffin. Accidentally drop crumbs on the ground so that there is less volume for me to eat. (Dogs circling like sharks). Take so long to eat it that I am able to watch the melting of the vegan buttercream icing into a sloppy mess.

Chug my latte while pinching my nose closed.
——————————————————–
I don’t know if I can wait for this miscarriage to happen on its own. These symptoms plague me, and are not the happy reassurance that they once were.

Now, excuse me while I puke.

TWW Symptom Obsessions

For those who aren’t familiar with the lingo, #DP5DT stands for number of days post 5-day blastocyst transfer. If you want to convert it to days post ovulation (DPO), you add 5 days (because our little blastocysts have had a 5 day head start.

For example: 9DP5DT means nine days post five day blastocyst transfer, and is equivalent to 14 days post ovulation.

Now for DW’s symptoms:

Saturday May 17th (5DP5DT)- mild cramping
Sunday May 18th (6DP5DT)- fatigue, dizziness, trace spotting
Tuesday May 20th (8DP5DT)- mild nausea, dizziness

Fingers and toes are all crossed!