So I’m hooked up to an IV of intralipids right now, typing on my iPhone with my left hand. The cannula is in my right hand and the expensive mayonnaise is cold as in enters my veins.
Last night my spotting turned into a gush of blood, then stopped overnight. In the morning, I saw some red/brown spotting again, took the dog for a hike in the woods, and then noticed that I had soaked a pad with bright red blood when I got home. I changed my pad, drove to the clinic for my intralipid infusion, and noticed that in the 30 minutes it took to drive there, I soaked a second pad with bright red blood.
I told them about my bleeding, and they took some blood to check my HCG levels again. We should find out the results either later today or tomorrow.
I’m totally freaked out now, as I’m having full on bleeding now, but I’m trying to take things in stride.
Why can’t I just have a drama-free pregnancy??? Universe, why can’t you just cut me a fucking break???
*Update*
So my beta HCG came back at 897. Yesterday it was 643. That’s a doubling time of 60 hours. The doubling time just ONE DAY ago was 32 hours.
My guess is that I may have miscarried a twin, hence the doubled doubling time. We’ll see what happens in the next couple of days. My file has been flagged for the RE to review, but I doubt that there’s anything he can do right now.
I don’t know what to think… I feel like I will be walking on eggshells until we see what’s going on in there (13 days).
This sucks.
Mama et Maman 
Oh sweetie, this is just not fair. I am PRAYING (and I don’t pray) that this is “just” a hematoma or something like that. Let us know when the HCG results are in. I am thinking of you big time.
Thanks Molly. I’m so scared.
I know–it’s impossible not to be. Take good care of yourself today. Try to keep the distractions flowing.
Thanks. I will try 🙂
Oh, oh. I’m holding you all in the light.
Thank you 🙂
Sigh! I wish things would go so much easier for you. Hoping that your hcg is on the rise and everything is ok! Please keep us updated when you hear the results.
Thanks. I will.
Oh, this is not fair at all! Saying prayers, sending love.
Thanks Andie.
I’ve been following your journey and all my prayers are being sent your way. I do want to let you know that I started to bleed heavily at 9.5 weeks. I went to the ER and everything was fine. I didn’t have cramping. The bleeding stopped. But then I kept spotting. I would then have some bright bleeding and then back to spotting. After a week I went to my doctor. She found a polyp and removed it. She said this was the cause. I then spotted for the next 2 weeks. It stopped 2 days ago. Baby is fine. So keep holding tight. Bleeding is so scary but it could be completely disconnected to the pregnancy!!
Thank you for sharing your story with me. I’m glad your bleeding turned out to be benign. I hope mine is too.
I am thinking of you. This shouldn’t be happening. You’re not cramping though? That is a good sign. Hoping too it is a hematoma.
Thanks. No cramping today. Had some cramping last night though.
I’ve been reading your blog for a little while now, and I want to just tell you that I am keeping you in all my best thoughts and prayers.
Thank you so much.
I really am praying for the hematoma explanation to be the case for you.
Thanks Decaf.
I wish there were something I could do to help.
Thanks. The positive intention certainly helps 🙂
Oh no, how scary! I hope everything works out. ((hugs))
Thank you 🙂
You really can’t catch a break. Enough already, Universe. You know already but I’ll say it again: I’m keeping you and your embies in my heart and prayers.
Thank you Linds.
I know someone from an IVF group who said she bled like a heavy period throughout her entire pregnancy. She now has a very healthy 1-year-old. I’m sending good thoughts your way!
Thank you Heather 🙂
I have been following your journey for quite some time as well, and you and your DW have been an inspiration to me and my DW. It breaks my heart to see how cruel the fertility gods are being to you!!! I hope you are able to keep your hopes up during this hard time, because many times bleeding is benign. However, I wanted to suggest that maybe you also have your progesterone checked and consider PIO (if you are not already). PIO is a literal PITA, but I was glad I had that safety net when we did IVF. Sending warm thoughts from California.
Hi there. Thanks for your kind words and advice. They checked my progesterone recently and it was sufficient apparently. We’re you on another form of progesterone before changing to the PIO?
Our doctor went the everything but the kitchen sink route – medrol pre-transfer, baby aspirin, estrogen pills 2xday, progesterone suppositories 3xday, and PIO at night through 9 weeks. We were doing reciprocal IVF, so I think this is the standard “surrogate” protocol at our clinic. Not sure if it was all necessary, but it seemed to work.
🙏👶🙏
❤ Keeping you in my thoughts.
Thank you.
Oh hon – this must be so scary. It’s never f#*kin ever just plain sailing is it? Sending Aroha from over here. I’ll be thinking of you all day. I’d ask for progesterone supplements. My clinic said they weren’t strictly necessary in my case (when my Prog plummeted but was still just within normal range), but they wouldn’t harm either. Gave me some extra peace of mind. Xx
Thanks. Yeah I’m already on progesterone suppositories 3x a day plus orally at night. They said my levels were fine.
Sounds like you are doing everything you possibly could be. X
Thank you.
Thinking of you
Thank you.
Oh my gosh. Thinking and sending prayers your way. How long before you know if in fact this was a twin? 😦
I don’t think we will unless it had already established a gestational sac.
13 days! UGH! We can wait it out together as our scan is another 8 days away. I’m sending lots of love and positivity your way. I like your twin theory and think that could be right. If not, let it be something completely unrelated like a polyp! Either way, just let that baby stick and stay!
Thanks. If I focus on the positive, my HCG is still rising, so that’s good. Something is in there, making HCG. How shall we keep ourselves distracted?
Isn’t that the question? Got any Netflix suggestions? Or any suggestions?
Well, we’re enjoying White Collar right now. It’s light and kinda funny. Oh, and has 5 seasons on Netflix. I’m also loving the Bachelor this season, but that’s almost over lol. Do you have Shomi? They’ve got a couple of seasons of Scandal, which is awesome.
No I don’t have Shomi! I should look into this.
If you have cable with Rogers or Bell, you might get Shomi for free until March (we do). Other than two shows on there, we haven’t thought it was worth purchasing.
Oh sweetie! I cannot believe this. I have no idea how you are holding yourself together right now. I am sending you every single positive wish and lots of love.
Thank you. I’m not sure how either. I’m trying to focus on the things that are going right- like the HCG still increasing. That’s all I can do for now, I guess. Oh, and will the bleeding to stop.
You are so right, the HCG is still increasing that that’s a good sign. I love that you are holding onto that and focusing on it. Sending you love and hope!
Thanks so much.
An understatement, but UGH. My thoughts are with you.
Thanks
Oh my goodness. You’re in my thoughts – what a scary situation.
Thanks
Ugh. Can they not do an u/s like now??? Not that you want anyone sticking a wand up there right now, but I would want to know what was going on STAT! You are in my thoughts!
Thank you. I’m not sure we’d see much right now, is the thing. At least nothing that is actionable. The good thing is that it looks like my HCG is still increasing, which means something is still alive.
Thinking of you. Hang in there!
Thank you.
Thinking of your family and sending positive thoughts and prayers!
Thank you
Pounding the table in frustration for you. This process just stinks. But,as you say, the hcg is headed in the right direction.
Thank you, Elizabeth.
My times went from 26.5 hrs to 32 hrs, to 54 hours. They say the first two are the most accurate and after that the timing slows down a lot. As long as it’s within 72 hour until week 5 it’s fine. Maybe that won’t help but I thought I’d let you know anyway in case you didn’t. I will hold out the faith for you!
Thank you. It does help. 🙂
PS take it easy, like laying down drinking water not moving kind of easy.
Yeah. I just had a nap 🙂 and I’m gonna go binge watch some Netflix.
If you are up for watching babies, “call the midwife” is a heartwarming show.
Oh goodness. That totally sucks. I hope that you’re okay and it’s good news that your HCG levels are still rising.
Thank you 🙂
Oh my gosh this is so stressful, I’m so sorry that you’re going through this after everything you’ve already been through. I will be thinking about you and sending you love all night.
Thank you.
Do you know if it’s too early for a MC to look like that? Maybe the embryo is too small to cause so much bleeding? I’m not sure.
I’m not sure. The bleeding stopped this afternoon. Thank goodness.
Ughhhh I hate this early pregnancy drama. I hope for you that this is just something completely unrelated causing the bleed, and the rest of your three trimesters are uneventful and totally Zen. Xx
Thanks me too!
Shit. I’m sorry for all of this blood and stress. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Thanks Spiritbaby. The bleeding stopped and then started again. Ugh.
Yeah, I see that and am so sorry. Had sick kid today, read nothing and did no work so just catching up.
Oh gosh – that’s a scary amount of blood. You did transfer two didn’t you? It could well be a lost twin. I have to say, the first weeks of pregnancy are right up there with the two week wait for crapness. You have this immediate surge of joy for a positive test and then godawful stress and fear every single minute about what’s going on inside your body once you know. I swear, the days between BFP and early heartbeat scan are almost unbearable. There is nothing any of us can do but hope. Wishing you lots of peace and love while you ride this out. xxx
Yes, you are so right. It’s worse than the TWW! In fact, I’ve never made it through over this hurdle to a heartbeat, so it’s particularly frightening. We are pretty sure that I miscarried one yesterday, hence the blood and decreasing beta rate.
I am so sorry you are going through this. Will be praying for you.
Thank you Becca.
Since I saw your post on IG, i have been thinking about you ladies. I’m praying and hoping that it’s nothing major and that it’s something completely unrelated to your pregnancy. Hopefully those numbers are on the rise and everything will be fine…sending you light and love…
Thank you. We’re pretty sure that I lost a twin.
I am so sorry you’re going through this! Hoping and praying the time passes as quickly as possible and that all is good at your ultrasound! Sending lots of love!!!
Thank you so much. I appreciate it 🙂